


snapshoot

by mingyuwu



Category: SEVENTEEN (Band), btsvt !!, 방탄소년단 | Bangtan Boys | BTS
Genre: Bottom Yoon Jeonghan, CEO seungcheol, CheolShua, Friends to Lovers to Enemies to Friends to Lovers, Jeon Jungkook & Park Jimin are Best Friends, Lamp - Freeform, M/M, MinWon - Freeform, Minor Jeon Wonwoo/Kim Mingyu, Multi, btsvt interactions, jeon jungkook and park jimin are going to be more than best friends, jeonghan existential crisis, jeonghan should consider therapy, not all characters will have equal participation, seungkwan diva child, someone help chan, taehyung is sexy, tags will be updated as story continues, yes namjoon and seokjin are siblings
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-11-26
Updated: 2020-12-06
Packaged: 2021-03-10 05:22:47
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 10,910
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27728066
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mingyuwu/pseuds/mingyuwu
Summary: yoon jeonghan’s flashy modeling lifestyle, dripping with money and exuberant beauty and grace- it’s only a glittering mirage that shields others from the complete mess he is inside.or, alternatively, the gyuhan models trope you’ve all been waiting for.[HIATUS, INF UPDATES]
Relationships: Choi Seungcheol | S.Coups/Hong Jisoo | Joshua, Hong Jisoo | Joshua/Yoon Jeonghan, Jeon Wonwoo/Kim Mingyu, Kim Mingyu/Yoon Jeonghan, Wen Jun Hui | Jun/Xu Ming Hao | The8
Comments: 11
Kudos: 29





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> hi!! 
> 
> this story was inspired by this tweet: 
> 
> https://twitter.com/mingyutteok/status/1323354639111245825?s=21

The chandeliers of the grand ballroom hung low over the masses, scintillating crystalline light flung down upon the socializing business profiles. Women wore bare strips of clothing, hanging off of their too-thin frames, cascading to the marble floors. Men were dressed in various types of attire, from stiff formalwear to strange eccentric styles often seen on runways- for that was where these people had the most experience. Flitting between them were black-tie consumers, all scanning, looking, moving on, striking conversations only if they believed they’d eventually strike gold with the models they chatted up. 

Tonight was a showcase in which prospective clients came to look at the various models offered by Pledis Agency. The company had gone all out in procuring the ballroom of a fancy hotel in the city for this event; and it was clearly stressed by that budget-straining purchase that everyone representing the agency today should find some sort of new customer. 

“Secure the profits,” their CEO had said in a meeting yesterday after summarizing the work needing to be done today. “The company’s not going to stand on its own much longer. We need sponsors and funds.”

So that was how Yoon Jeonghan found himself here, sandwiched between two of his fellow coworkers (because that was what CEO Choi had thought of as an ‘appropriate grouping’) and touring the ballroom, which was becoming increasingly stuffy and hot. 

And Jeonghan firmly reminded himself that he was not sweating because of any parties that may or may not attend tonight, and it was purely the derivative of his stylist choosing to dress him in a thick woolen-type white cardigan over an already white shirt and pants. Angel theme, Joshua had said as the spiffy man had turned Jeonghan around to face the mirror a few hours previous. Apparently ‘angel’ was going to get Jeonghan a few clients today, because he did indeed see many businesspeople glancing his way. 

“Hyung, you’re beading up,” came a voice from his right, and Jeonghan allowed Chan, one of the youngest models at the company, to dab at his upper lip with one of those maintenance tissues Chan always carried. 

“It’s hot in here,” Soonyoung responded for Jeonghan, scanning the crowds. Another newbie, this was Soonyoung’s first convention and he was clearly clueless- which was why Jeonghan supposed CEO Choi had shoved them into his care for the night. As a model working for nearly ten years in the industry, Jeonghan knew exactly how to get into these executive buyers’ minds- and sometimes, if necessary to make the deal, their pants. 

Tonight, the three of them really did stand out; Jeonghan had to admit. Soonyoung and Chan were both wearing blue over white undershirts and slim-fitting pants that tapered slightly at the ankles. When contrasted to Jeonghan’s ‘angel’ theme, their little trio did make quite an appearance. Joshua’s work paid off as usual. Well, there was no other reason why he was the most coveted stylist at the agency. That and the fact that Joshua had a direct link with the CEO- but not everyone knew about that because not everyone was Yoon Jeonghan and not everyone snooped around at office doors to listen to the sound of a lot of things knocking over in what seemed to be the haste of two people (read: Choi Seungcheol and Joshua Hong) to get naked. 

(And not everyone was evil enough to take blackmail audio and hold it over their stylist’s head the next time that Joshua had begged Jeonghan to wax his private parts for a runway walk). 

“Hyung,” Soonyoung voiced, drawing Jeonghan out of a happy reverie of his best friend yelling at him to _delete those tapes right now Jeonghan or I’ll wax you in your sleep-_ “Hyung, people are coming our way!”

Jeonghan smoothly ran a hand through his hair. “Let’s get talking then.”

After sweetening up several buyers, Jeonghan strangely felt exhausted.

He couldn’t understand why. He’d spent half his life in this kind of career, and talking to others was supposed to be his specialty.

It was alright if they only made a few deals, Jeonghan mused, his gaze sweeping through the room. Junhui and Minghao were surrounded by a veritable cluster of clients, and they’d bring in quite enough income for the company with their killer looks and charisma. Jeonghan had influence, and Soonyoung and Chan had talent and skill. It wasn’t like they’d get kicked out for only making four deals tonight.

But he was unsatisfied. A tremor ran through his body, an impatient itch to ensnare and reel in potential clients. He hated being second best. 

“Hyung!” Chan grabbed at his sleeve, yanking it and disturbing the knit strings, and Jeonghan turned, an irritable snap ready on his lips as reprimand for the younger boy messing up his outfit, only to find him staring off at the domed archway entrance to the ballroom.

Soonyoung’s eyes were glossy with admiration as he stared in the same direction. “Who are _they,_ hyung?”

Jeonghan felt the foreboding already. He turned and cursed. 

Three men that’d clearly just arrived were standing at the doors to the ballroom, brushing nonexistent dust off their lapels. 

“Wow,” Chan whispered, like he’d had his very breath stolen right out of his chest.

“Rivals,” was all Jeonghan said, putting his arm around either boy. “Rivals, that’s all. Now let’s go. Refreshment time. We can go on break. I think that Jeongguk and Jimin are stealing the show right now, so let’s let them strut a bit and get their clients and we can resume.”

“Hyung, they’re so- good looking!” Soonyoung fawned as Jeonghan dragged the pair of them off to the drinks table, hoping fervently that the midnight-haired, dark eyed handsome model still standing with his two colleagues at the door hadn’t seen or noticed him. 

•

“You can hold your alcohol, right?” Jeonghan asked the pair. Soonyoung nodded confidently, while Chan, freshly of age, looked a little more unsure. Jeonghan rapped his knuckles on the bar, calling the attention of the bartender. “Three cocktails, Clase Azul Reposado tequila, please - lime, strawberry, and watermelon. Make the watermelon one light,” Jeonghan added, jerking his head in Chan’s direction. “Can’t have him heaving onto a client in an hour.”

The man nodded and bustled off, and the three of them settled on the stools, looking out at the crowded room.

“Good turnout,” Soonyoung commented, accepting the strawberry cocktail offered to him and eating the fruit off the edge of the glass, then running his tongue along the rim to lick off the sugar border, much to the affront- and clear disgust- of the bartender. 

“Can you please act like a professional?” Jeonghan hissed, raising his own drink to his lips and taking a sip, tangy citrus filling his mouth- too tangy. He waited until the bartender moved away to purse his lips and pull the glass slightly away, swirling the liquid around in the glass, a shaft of light from a chandelier above adding a pretty shade to the drink. “Gods, this shit is twenty dollars? Tastes like ass with a spritz of lemon.”

“Capitalism,” Chan sighed, trying to act as dignified as possible while lifting what was probably the third cocktail in his life to his lips. 

“Good thing Seungcheol-ssi is paying for all of this,” Soonyoung agreed, likewise disappointed with the cocktail after he’d actually sipped the thing. 

Jeonghan couldn’t take another mouthful of this- whatever it was- so after a quick glance around to make sure nobody was looking, he dumped the whole damn thing into a nearby potted plant, earning snickers from his friends as they quickly followed suit. 

“Who are they though?” Chan prodded, copying Soonyoung as he ran his lips around the top of his glass to suck up sugar crystals. “The people you called our rivals.”

“You two won’t know them. They’re company higher ups, working nearly as long as me.”

“But how can people that work in our company be our rivals? We all get profit from one another right?” Soonyoung asked, and Jeonghan pretended not to hear that question as he instead stilled Soonyoung’s hand on its way to the younger boy’s hair, evidently to tousle it out of its gelled state. 

“How can they be our rivals?” Chan pressed as well.

Jeonghan sighed. There was no evading this. “They’re not the _company’s_ rivals. They’re mine.”

“Oooh,” Soonyoung said, his eyes wide as doubloons. “Tea?”

“Tell us!” Chan said, and Jeonghan bitterly stared across the ballroom, accidentally making eye contact with the one person he’d been trying to covertly look at. A burning wave of regret and embarrassment pushed him under, and by the time he’d resurfaced the tall model had already looked away, his gaze cool.

“No,” Jeonghan said simply. “It’s old drama, it doesn’t matter. Been nearly a year.”

“At least tell us who they are!”

Jeonghan sighed. “The guy in white is Chwe Hansol. Gray is Lee Seokmin. I don’t care about either of them. And the tall one-” Jeonghan felt something stick in his throat, and by the time he’d swallowed that painful lump of longing Soonyoung and Chan seemed to have figured it out.

“Did that guy steal the runway from you?” Chan whispered, his voice hushed theatrically. 

Nevermind. 

“No,” Jeonghan said quietly. “He stole something else. That’s Kim Mingyu and I wouldn’t bother with him.” Jeonghan stood, rolling his shoulders, then slowly sat back down. “I think we need some more time over here.”

Chan’s mouth was O shaped now, as if he’d connected the dots. Jeonghan pre-silenced him with a glare, resting his hand on his jaw and blowing his fringe off his forehead. 

“Can we please just order some shots?” Soonyoung begged Jeonghan. “Please. I can’t drink more ‘margarita’ shit.”

“More shots,” Chan confirmed, waving the bartender over.

“Load him up, he’s a man in love,” Soonyoung crooned to the bartender, who was clearly not used to this kind of behavior. The man gave Soonyoung a look before doubtfully complying and sliding a set of five amber-colored shots in Jeonghan’s direction. 

“These are all mine?” Jeonghan asked glumly, looking down at them. “I’m not in love, either, so please don’t.”

“Drink up, hyung,” Soonyoung confirmed. “Kim Taehyung’s arrived so we’re all going out of deals.” He gestured to the entrance, where Taehyung had surely strode in, dressed in a getup of elaborate swan-like black feathers. Being Seungcheol’s main golden goose, Taehyung always was given pretty costumes to lure in clients and steal the show. 

“Why are all the Kims at our agency so dreamy?” Chan agreed. “Kim Seokjin, Kim Namjoon- well, he’s in accounting and he doesn’t actually work as talent but _still-_ Kim Taehyung, and now that Kim Mingyu!”

Jeonghan downed the first shot. 

“I know,” Soonyoung frowned. “Also, Jeonghan, how could you not be in love? I think I’m in love with Mingyu-ssi and I’ve barely seen him for three seconds.”

The second shot went down after the first, coating Jeonghan’s throat with a bitter, burning feeling that was somehow melancholy and represented the storm in his mind.

“Why would he love his rival?” Chan snorted. “Especially after that guy stole something from Jeonghan! What did he steal, hyung? Did you report it to human resources?”

The third shot clouded Jeonghan’s mind, and he felt much better as he wiped his mouth with the back of his hand, knowing that somewhere Joshua was blending in with the crowds with a makeup palette in hand, silently cursing him for smearing off the lip tint. 

“Yeah,” Soonyoung questioned. “You never told us what he stole.”

“My beliefs regarding trust and love,” was all Jeonghan said, and it was as if a frost had spread over the conversation.

Chan gaped at him. “So he _was_ your lover?”

Jeonghan threw his head back and took the fourth shot in reply.

“Shit,” Soonyoung ooed. “That’s why you didn’t want to talk about him.”

Jeonghan rolled his eyes, reaching for the last shot-

Caramel-tone slender fingers wrapped around his wrist, the owner’s other hand reaching for the tiny glass. Vanilla cologne filled the air, silver rings clinking against the glass as the infiltrant raised it to his full bow lips, which were brushed with a shimmering rose color tonight. 

Midnight hair spilled over Mingyu’s forehead as he tipped his head back, dark eyelashes fluttering shut as he drank the shot, the angles of his face catching every light. Damn Joshua and his highlighting skills. Mingyu’s jawline was definitely a weapon. 

“Sorry,” came the deep reply seconds later as the glass was precisely set onto the counter of the bar. “I couldn’t resist.”

Jeonghan merely stared at Mingyu, at a loss for words.

“Y-you’re Mingyu, right?” Chan asked, wide eyed. Jeonghan nearly facepalmed. 

Mingyu flashed him a pleasant smile, canines sharp and beautiful as ever. “Yes. Are you new? I assume you’re a talent, not a businessman.”

“Signed last month,” Chan replied as they shook hands, glancing at Jeonghan every few seconds as if asking him to confirm that yes, this was the very man that had Jeonghan slamming down four shots within two minutes.

“And I’m Soonyoung,” Soonyoung rushed in, hand proffered for Mingyu to grasp. “Kwon Soonyoung. I’m also new, I signed when Chan did.”

“You look very handsome tonight, Soonyoung,” Mingyu replied, the compliment dripping off of him like honey. “I noticed your aura from across the room.”

“Thank you,” Soonyoung blushed. “You too.”

Jeonghan desperately wanted to get away.

A jazzy, slow swing song began playing over the speakers as the lights dimmed. Business time was over, and now food and drinks would be served in the intermission; tiny bowls of _japchae_ and quaint trays of _bibim mandu_ with flutes of champagne. They would be expected to entertain their guests in order to seal any last trailing deals before the second part of the night began with speeches and later dancing. 

Jeonghan cursed under his breath. As if this could get any worse.

Two men appeared behind Mingyu- Hansol and Seokmin, right on schedule as they always were, trailing after their friend.

“Hi,” Chan said, again wide-eyed as he shook hands with both of the others. “Lee Chan.”

Seokmin beamed back at him, the man’s original professional atmosphere completely shattered. “Lee Seokmin.”

Hansol and Soonyoung mingled politely, leaving Jeonghan with nowhere to look at but the cut of Mingyu’s outfit. It was some sort of long black shirt with a neckline that draped so low that Jeonghan could see the shadowy, well-maintained planes of Mingyu’s chest.

He hadn’t realized that he’d been looking so closely until Mingyu’s voice slammed into his mind. “Eyes up here, Yoon. Although I know the view is delicious.”

Jeonghan willed himself to regain his composure and met Mingyu’s eyes, his gaze icy now as he stared with what he hoped was an unfeeling expression to the slightly younger male. “You flatter yourself, Kim. I was simply inspecting the fabric design. It’s similar to something Joshua- Mr. Hong- was describing for my next runway.”

Mingyu scanned Jeonghan from head to toe, slightly put-off by Jeonghan’s lack of a reaction. “You don’t look too bad yourself. And thank you. I’ll send your compliments to Boo,” Mingyu added, naming the other stylist that split work with Joshua. 

“Thank you,” Jeonghan said crisply, and turned to tell his boys it was time to leave, but Chan and Seokmin had already wandered off together, completely breaking the protocol that Seungcheol had set when he’d told them he wanted them to stick in their groupings. Hansol and Soonyoung were talking to a pair of businesswomen in identical swirling updos, their hair wrapped around their heads in what looked ridiculously like a bee’s nest. 

Of course they’d deserted him here.

Mingyu was still gazing at him, lips slightly parted as if he wanted to speak-

“What is going on here?” Joshua hissed, materializing and hedging himself between them, causing Mingyu to take a few steps back as Joshua whipped out a tiny detail brush and began redoing a miniscule blemish on Jeonghan’s temple. “Where are your partners? Seungcheol’s coming in for his speech soon and if he sees this mess-”

“Easy, Joshua-ssi,” Mingyu said easily, looking over the heads of the crowds. “I’ll see him from a mile off and be on my way to collect my companions. Jeonghan and I are- were- having a light chat.” Mingyu’s lips curled into a smirk. “Right, Yoon?”

“Yes,” Jeonghan forced out, glad Joshua had obstructed Mingyu from his view. 

_You okay?_ Joshua mouthed at Jeonghan, under the pretense of straightening a stray eyebrow. Jeonghan felt a crashing sense of relief that his best friend was here. Joshua was no idiot, and Mingyu wasn’t either. They were only pretending to be professionals because the bartender was feet away. Outside of this kind of event, Joshua and Jeonghan were on one side and Mingyu on the other. As a stylist, Joshua had the privilege to be able to insert himself into any situation and luckily had come to Jeonghan’s rescue. Thank god. 

Trust Joshua to always be here right on time. Clearly he’d seen Jeonghan getting cornered and come to save the day. Jeonghan vowed that next time Joshua attempted pitching a new hair color to him he’d agree. 

Joshua repeated the same question, this time in a whisper, and Jeonghan blinked at him, merely replying with a silent _Thank you._

“He looks fine,” Mingyu muttered impatiently, quiet enough so the bartender wouldn’t overhear, and Joshua nearly flinched, both of them having forgotten the former was there. “Screw off, Hong.”

That was more like it.

“I’m not leaving him with _you_ ,” Joshua hissed back, now immensely focused on fixing Jeonghan’s lips. “Pucker for me, please,” he said, raising his voice as he slipped back into the role he was supposed to be playing, swiping the tickly brush over Jeonghan’s philtrum.

Jeonghan did so, gazing at Joshua’s delicate face as it came so close to his.

Mingyu waited as Joshua slowly lowered his brush, looking over Jeonghan’s face desperately as if trying to find another flaw that’d save Jeonghan a few more moments.

“I think it’s actually time for you to change your costume for the night,” Joshua said hurriedly, having realized that Jeonghan’s face was sadly too perfect to invent any problems onto. “The intermission’s perfect timing. After assessing the temperature in here, I don’t want you sweating in this, luckily I’ve brought some other outfits that may be more suitable-”

“I think he looks fine in what he’s wearing,” Mingyu said coldly. “Joshua-ssi-”

“Let’s go,” Joshua said, grabbing Jeonghan by the wrist and dragging him off. 

Jeonghan followed Joshua to a hotel room, where the stylists had set up a makeshift camp to grab people at intervals and fix them up. 

The room was luckily empty, and somehow Joshua and Seungkwan had moved the beds along the wall to allow more space for clothing racks and kits of makeup. 

Joshua waited until he’d shut the door behind themselves, sliding the bolt into the latch before turning on Jeonghan. 

“Yes, I know about the lip tint,” Jeonghan said wearily, sinking into a chair and staring at his wan face in the light-studded mirror Joshua had balanced at the junction of the wall and desktop. “I shouldn’t have rubbed it off but-”

“You-” Joshua sighed, shaking his head as he neared, already shifting through the assortment of costumes he had hung on several clothing racks. “What are you talking about, lip tint? I told you to avoid him, remember?”

Jeonghan blinked. “Sorry.”

“I told you he’ll try to talk to you tonight,” Joshua added bitterly, ripping a plastic sheet off a suit. “Here. Put this on.”

Jeonghan stood and numbly stripped, barely noticing Joshua’s warm, familiar touch brushing against his skin as his best friend helped him get the new outfit on. 

“There. This’ll do. There’s just the speeches and dance floor closing deals left, that’ll take another two hours, and from what I’ve seen on the program we have forty five minutes left of intermission until the speeches start,” Joshua fretted, straightening Jeonghan’s hair in front of the mirror. “Take this wipe, I’m going to redo your makeup, we need a different look for this costume. How many sells?”

“Four,” Jeonghan replied, lightly dabbing the makeup wipe to his face. “Just four. Tough crowd tonight. Seungcheol isn’t going to be happy,” he added, referring to the CEO informally. 

“It’s CEO Choi for us,” Joshua said, gently pinching Jeonghan’s arm. 

“Not for you,” Jeonghan leveled, staring at Joshua through the mirror.

“What?” Joshua flushed.

Jeonghan stared at him coolly, although half the view was covered with the makeup wipe he had positioned over his right eye as he sopped eyeshadow off gently. “Did you think I didn’t know?”

Joshua knocked over a hairspray bottle in his flustered state. “I don’t want to talk about it.”

“You’re never gonna want to, though.”

Joshua shrugged. “Let me live my life and I’ll let you live yours.”

Jeonghan lightly nudged him. “Excuse me? You control every aspect of mine. You’re literally my coordinator.” He aimed for the trash bin and seconds later the makeup wipe fell to the floor inches away, its downfall accompanied by a disappointed sound of the pitcher. 

“And Seungcheol controls my paycheck,” Joshua said evenly, snatching the wipe from the floor and tossing it into the bin. 

Jeonghan’s eyes widened. “Don’t tell me you’re just doing it for-”

Joshua inhaled sharply, steering Jeonghan to the desk. “Let’s get to work now. I’ll make you look sexy.”

“More sexy than whatever Seungkwan put on Taehyung?” _And Mingyu,_ Jeonghan thought, but he didn’t say that part out loud. 

“I don’t know _what_ that black feather abomination is, and my sole comfort to you is that the level of grease makeup that Seungkwan did on Taehyung’s eyelids should be enough to either scare people off or entice only a few brave offers. Either way, I think you’ll still be able to steal the show. Wait here. Let me get some things I packed.” Joshua moved off to the other side of the room to his bags, leaving Jeonghan in front of the mirror. “It doesn’t matter, does it? A client for Taehyung could be a client for you.” A dry laugh. “But I know how much my Hannie wants to be the flashiest.”

Jeonghan stared dully at his reflection. Joshua had put him in a shimmery white suit jacket with diamond coils and fitted double vents, nothing on underneath. He supposed he looked flashy, although his chest wasn’t as impressive as Mingyu’s.

He had to stop thinking about Mingyu. 

“Tilt,” Joshua ordered, shoving Jeonghan down into the chair. Jeonghan obeyed, turning his face to the ceiling, allowing Joshua to carefully trace silver eyeliner onto his lids, letting his eyes roll back into his head and enjoying the dark peace and quiet. There was only the feeling of Joshua’s breath against his forehead, a gentle hand cradling the back of Jeonghan’s head to keep him at the position necessary.

“Han, don’t sleep right now.” Joshua knew him too well. 

Jeonghan let out a hum of agreement, but he felt himself slipping away at the feeling of Joshua dusting something down the side of his neck with a fat powder brush. He had no idea why Joshua was applying anything there, but he was too sleepy to bother. He’d been rushing around all day for the convention; from an early morning session at the gym to a long bath afterwards to ease his sore muscles, followed by a few hours spent chatting with Joshua as the latter did him up for the evening. Not to mention that the shoes Joshua had selected for him had been flats with nearly an inch of sole on the bottom, and his legs hurt horribly. The four shots he’d impulsively drank weren’t helping either. 

“I’m serious. You’ll have to go soon. Forty minutes now.” Joshua’s brush drifted lower, disappearing from Jeonghan’s skin momentarily before returning and redusting whatever it was, now dipping onto Jeonghan’s collarbones, carefully moving the lapel of the suit aside as cold air hit Jeonghan’s chest, causing his pectorals to stiffen. “You shouldn’t have drank like that too, it was quite irresponsible. You know your tolerance isn’t so good these days. I was watching across the room.”

Jeonghan whined softly at Joshua’s firm reprimand. “What are you putting on me?” Jeonghan murmured drowsily, more in an effort to convince Joshua that he was still awake. 

“You’ll see. Just trust me, it’ll look great.”

Cool air wafted inside again with the sound of the door swooshing open, and Jeonghan thought he heard a familiar pair of voices entering, but he was already gone.

•

“They’ve still got five minutes, let them rest. Even half an hour of sleep can do wonders.” Seungkwan’s voice yanked Jeonghan back to the land of the living. 

“Jeonghan takes half an hour to wake up properly,” Joshua’s voice cut back. 

Jeonghan felt a kink in his neck and groaned, causing the voices to silence. There were soft snores on his right, familiar in a way that made him remember rainy days spent under white covers. 

“Han? You’ve got to go soon. The speeches are starting.” Joshua’s voice was soft as the fingers that gently massaged Jeonghan’s shoulder.

Jeonghan slowly raised his head, blinking sleep out of his eyes and glancing to his right. He wished he hadn’t.

Mingyu- _when did Mingyu get here?_ \- was sprawled fast asleep in the chair next to Jeonghan’s, dressed in the exact alter outfit to Jeonghan’s; a black blazer with absolutely nothing beneath it, revealing a strong chest that’d been powdered in golden dust, complementing his honey skin. Seungkwan had redone Mingyu’s hair too, it was now off his forehead, a few strands curling back over in a comma style that not many people could pull off like that. 

Jeonghan blinked and stared at his own reflection in the mirror, then at Mingyu, then at Joshua. 

“Seungkwan drew inspiration from my idea,” Joshua said hastily, still holding the brush tipped in silver dust that he’d been spreading over Jeonghan’s exposed skin. 

“I am not wearing this anymore,” Jeonghan said crossly as he stood, the sudden movement stirring Mingyu awake too. “I am not matching with him. Why is he even in here?”

“Excuse me, Mr. Yoon, but the dressing room is for everyone to share,” Seungkwan said indignantly on Mingyu’s behalf, who was still staring sleepily around the room the way Jeonghan had been minutes ago. “And my talent needed retouching. You should be honored, really, Joshua-ssi has an excellent sense of fashion and Mingyu and I both agreed that he’d look good in something similar. It’s a compliment to your stylist.”

“We aren’t even matching, Yoon, please shut up,” Mingyu yawned, standing up and instantly towering over Jeonghan’s lean body. 

“You’re black and gold and I’m white and silver, Kim, are you just aesthetically blind or-”

“Shut up,” Mingyu repeated coolly as he straightened his suit, which was a double slap in the face because Jeonghan knew he was two years older than Mingyu and the other really shouldn’t be talking to him like that.

“Come on, Gyu, let’s go,” Seungkwan humphed, grasping Mingyu’s elbow and flouncing from the room, the tall man in tow. Jeonghan glared after them, about to go and demand Mingyu to rip that thing off and put something else on because Jeonghan had gotten the concept first and-

“Ignore them,” Joshua said calmly, forcing Jeonghan to his feet. “Come on, we’ve got to go and get your group members.”

“How long was he there?” Jeonghan fumed as they walked from the room. 

“Just after you fell asleep. Apparently some girl tried to pull one on him and messed up his hair. Seungkwan dragged him in here and pronounced a complete makeover, and saw what I did to you, and demanded I let him do something similar to Mingyu.” Joshua shook his head. “You know how Seungkwan gets, Jeonghan, don’t look at me like that. I couldn’t say no. Like, actually. He was talking like he was about to pull a knife on me if I didn’t let him use my gold glitter.”

Jeonghan shuddered, knowing perfectly well the gleam in Seungkwan’s eyes that the over-the-top man’s poor talents were forced to endure. Suddenly feeling rather sympathetic for Kim Taehyung and his friend group and- grudgingly- for Mingyu and his circle of colleagues, Jeonghan followed Joshua back into the ballroom, feeling refreshed after his nap but also rather irritable about the fact that Joshua had let Mingyu near Jeonghan when he was defenseless. Not like Mingyu would do anything to him, but still. Jeonghan felt irritated by the other’s mere presence. It was a wonder that he hadn’t woken up. 

Choi Seungcheol was already standing at the podium, looking handsome as ever in a snugly fitting suit, his hair raked back from his forehead as he surveyed the audience.

Joshua shoved Jeonghan in the direction of Chan and Soonyoung before melting into the crowds. 

“Where have you been?” Soonyoung whispered as Jeonghan rejoined them. “Wow- new outfit!”

“Thanks,” Jeonghan said, although he had no idea if it was a compliment. “Went to get retouched during intermission.”

“Was Mingyu-ssi there too?” Chan peeped. “He looks different too. Like, another costume.”

Jeonghan glanced over to where Mingyu was already entertaining a crowd of other talents, the gold on his bare skin gleaming under the chandeliers. He was already attracting glances from businessfolk, and Jeonghan knew where they’d flock to after the speeches ended.

“Yeah, he was there,” Jeonghan sighed, straightening his own suit and paying attention to the front, where Seungcheol was trying to get everyone’s attention. 

“Were you guys like… in a bad breakup?” Soonyoung asked, in character of his habit of not being able to read the room.

Jeonghan hummed. “Something like that.”

“How long ago?” Soonyoung followed up with, earning a nudge from Chan.

“Hyung, he might not want to talk about it-”

“No, I get it,” Jeonghan confessed. “I’d be curious too.” He sighed. “Maybe another time. Tomorrow after the Aeropostal shoot?”

“Okay,” Soonyoung confirmed, and they turned back to the front to watch Seungcheol, Jeonghan’s mind too far away.


	2. Chapter 2

Kim Mingyu had always had the stupidly childish habit of leaving the lights on at night.

It used to be a source of irritation for Jeonghan, to traipse out of his room of their shared apartment in the early morning to find the living room light still burning away, the kitchen’s beamlight humming softly, rendered completely useless in the bright daylight. Jeonghan knew Mingyu was, despite the younger boy’s posturing, absolutely terrified of the dark and needed every light on in the apartment at night despite those rooms obviously not being in use and hiking up their electricity bill. 

It’d been one of the caveats Jeonghan had warned Mingyu about when they’d started dating and he’d moved across their tiny hallway to Mingyu’s room instead. The request had been to leave the light off in the bedroom at least, so Jeonghan could sleep peacefully. It was a caveat that Jeonghan had relented on barely two weeks later because he couldn’t deal with Mingyu tossing and turning all night and whining softly for Jeonghan to allow him to turn on the tiny lamp at the bedside table.

So Jeonghan had reluctantly allowed Mingyu to leave that stupid small lamp on and laid there in the dim light with Mingyu fast asleep at his side, slightly annoyed at himself for tangling himself in this sleepless mess, but too scared to reach over and turn out the light because it meant he’d have to extricate himself from Mingyu’s embrace.

And then things had ended abruptly between them and Mingyu had moved out but forgotten to take his damn little lamp with him, so the shitty mahogany-carved thing still sat there on the bedside table in the room that used to be Mingyu’s and was now Jeonghan’s because he wanted to stay here instead of his old room across the hall, which he’d turned into a studio for practicing angles and shots and camerawork. 

And he tried his best not to think about that stupid lamp. He even tried giving it away to charity once, but he’d turned around and drove back home. He couldn’t part with the damn thing. 

Jeonghan found himself thinking of the lamp as Joshua drove him home from the showcase.

It was nearly one in the morning when Jeonghan arrived at his apartment, the key jingling in Joshua’s hand as the latter let him in, a gentle hand on his shoulder. “You sure you can take care of yourself from here?”  
Jeonghan nodded, the world swaying. The alcohol from a few hours previous had only taken a toll on his condition, not to mention the amount of beer he’d sipped on through the speeches. 

Joshua looked rather concerned, but he nodded slowly, pressing the key into Jeonghan’s hand. “Okay. Text me tomorrow morning. Ten AM, okay? For the Aero shoot. Lock your door from inside, please.”

“Yeah,” Jeonghan mumbled, waving at Joshua as the latter closed the door. Jeonghan clumsily clicked the latch in, sliding the bolt across to secure the door before moving into his apartment. 

He half-mindedly stripped out of his clothes and into the shower, unsure of how much he actually cleaned himself before stepping out again, so out of it that he walked down the hall dripping wet and naked only to grab a tupperware of plain pasta from the fridge and sit on his counter eating it as he wondered how his mood had taken such a downward turn. 

He finished the pasta glumly and stared at the empty tupperware, realizing he’d forgotten to heat the thing. A thousand memories surfaced of Mingyu chiding him to not eat food cold from the fridge and to always warm them up in the microwave because of whatever microorganisms that could grow on them. 

Mingyu would certainly have something to say if he saw Jeonghan sitting here bare and soaked, shivering as he ate food on his kitchen counter. 

Whatever. Mingyu wasn’t a part of his life anymore. 

Jeonghan tossed the plastic container into the sink, hearing it clatter. He’d take care of it tomorrow morning.

Dragging his feet to his bedroom, he crawled over to the heap of laundry he’d left there pre-shower and rummaged through his outfit to find wherever he’d stuffed his phone. Upon retrieval, he clutched the device in his hand as he kicked the clothes into his closet to add to the growing mound of dirty clothes. 

He’d take care of that tomorrow too.

Jeonghan had been saying that for weeks, and the dirty dishes kept piling up as the laundry did, occasional bursts of angry motivation clearing the apartment for a few days before the dull numbness set in again. 

Whatever, he repeated to himself, stumbling to the bed. Whatever, whatever, whatever.

Jeonghan let his body hit the sheets, and he drowsily stared at the lamp. He had no idea when he’d turned it on, maybe it’d been before leaving for the event tonight, maybe it’d been after he’d come home, maybe he’d just flicked it on. He didn’t even know why he’d turned it on. All it did was make him feel fucking miserable. 

Jeonghan stared angrily at it, at the stupid reminder of his stupid ex and his stupidly endearing habits.

He lurched up and out of bed, kneeling at the socket beneath the nightstand and ripping the plug out, sending the room into darkness. This was, of course, completely unnecessary seeing as the lamp came with a switch function, but it definitely felt more satisfying this way. Jeonghan grinned vindictively at the plug in his hand, dropping it to the floor and getting to his feet, instantly smashing his head on the protruding edge of the little table seeing as the room was now pitch dark and he couldn’t see for shit. 

“Oh, fuck,” Jeonghan hissed, holding his head as he shut his eyes tightly, fumbling for the plug again to reconnect it to the socket, and then reaching his hand around until he found the base of the lamp and pressed the little switch, restoring light to the room. 

He opened one eye, then the other, his line of sight clouded with those weird things that sometimes floated around in your vision but went away after a few blinks. 

Jeonghan tentatively pulled his hand away from his head, staring at his palm to affirm that there was no blood on it. Hesitantly, he poked at the swollen lump on the crown of his head, and after making sure his head wouldn’t explode if he stood up, he gingerly made his way back onto the bed, collapsing lightly onto the sheets and grumbling as he stared at the stupid lamp, which was shining innocently once again. 

“I fucking hate my life, oh my god,” Jeonghan groaned, needing someone to talk to. He opened his phone and scrolled through his contacts, squinting to make out the blurriness of everything after the alcohol and probable concussion he’d just received. 

Joshua, no. He’d put up with Jeonghan enough tonight. Soonyoung and Chan didn’t know him well enough to sympathize with his eccentric ways, CEO Choi would fire him if Jeonghan called him raging drunk… 

Jeonghan smiled stupidly as he spotted another name. Yes, the person responsible for him being in this depressing situation. 

Mingyu picked up on the second ring. “Yoon? What do you want?”

“You…” Jeonghan accused. “Your lamp…”

Mingyu paused. And then, in a voice so different from the cold one seconds ago, “Hyung? Are you okay?”

“Your stupid lamp…” Jeonghan mumbled. “Hit my head… because of it…”

Another pause. “Are you drunk or something?”

“Shut up,” Jeonghan slurred. “You… I hate you, Kim, I hate you…”

“I know,” Mingyu said.

“And your stupid lamp that you left here… my head really… ow… shit… why’d you buy this table…”

“Do you want me to send someone to you? Is your head okay?” 

“No… I hate you so much… you and your stupid lamp…”

“Throw it out,” Mingyu said, as if it was an obvious answer.

“I can’t,” Jeonghan mumbled, tears pricking his eyes. “I can’t… because… I don’t really hate it that much…” He heard something sizzling on the other end of the phone. “Are you cooking?”

“Yes,” Mingyu said, sounding amused. “Please tell me you went home and had something to eat to balance out all those shots.”

“I miss your…” Jeonghan hiccuped. “Kimchi fried rice. I miss it…”

“I’ll drop some off at your place tomorrow then, if you’d like. As apology for my lamp being the cause of you smashing your head on my table.”

“You… bastard…”

Mingyu chuckled. “Thanks for the compliment. I think I like you better drunk.”

“You…” Jeonghan closed his eyes. “I ate the pasta… cold… didn’t heat it up…”

“Hyung, you’re making no sense right now. You know that right?”

“I should’ve heated it,” Jeonghan insisted, screwing up his eyes as he made himself more comfortable in the sheets. “Where are you?”

“Home.”

And Jeonghan knew that he was so drunk that he wouldn’t remember this tomorrow, so he blurted out a longing, “But you’re not… here…”

Silence on the other end of the line. And then another voice, echoing as if from the other side of the kitchen Mingyu was in. “Gyu? I didn’t know that you were home already.”

Jeonghan was too sleepy to grasp reality, but at the same time he wanted to know who the owner of the voice was. He really, really wanted to know. 

“Won? I told you not to wait up.”

“I just wanted to make sure you got home okay.” Jeonghan laid still, half asleep, hating the sounds of fabric rustling as Mingyu hugged whoever it was, as they kissed and Mingyu made a little sound of happiness that set Jeonghan’s limp body aflame with anger. 

“Who’s on the phone?” 

“My… friend. Jeonghan. I think he’s really drunk.”

“I am not your friend, Kim Mingyu,” Jeonghan whined, tears streaming down his cheeks, having been provoked a few sentences ago at the sound of the other man’s voice. “I am not!”

“Wow, he doesn’t sound okay,” the mysterious _Won_ said, sounding concerned. “You should make sure he’s alright.”

“I know. Here, take this, I bet you skipped dinner to wait for me. I’ll only be a moment, let me finish this call.”

“Okay.”

The line was quiet for a few more seconds, and Jeonghan heard a door shutting and then Mingyu’s voice filled his ears again. “I’m back.”

“He sounds nice,” Jeonghan mumbled, aware that he was barely conscious and Mingyu probably wouldn’t even understand what he’d said. 

“He is nice,” Mingyu replied haltingly.

Jeonghan began to cry in earnest, and he couldn’t help it. He knew he was an emotional drunk, he knew that he’d screwed himself over tonight merely by the time the first shot had gone down his throat. 

“Hyung?” Mingyu sounded worried. “Why are you crying?”

“My head… really hurts…” Jeonghan sniffled, feeling himself drifting off. “I…”

He heard Mingyu talking to him, but Jeonghan couldn’t make sense of the words and his feelings and the pain so he let himself fall into sleep.

•

Waking up hungover and with the doorbell ringing incessantly at 8 AM was not a lovely way to start your Tuesday morning.

Jeonghan practically snarled as he ripped the sheets off of himself, clutching his slightly-still-throbbing head and launching himself across the apartment to meet the person assailing his doorknob. 

He wrenched it open and furrowed his eyebrows when he saw Mingyu, of all people, leaning against his doorway, holding a container of food.

“What?” Jeonghan snapped.

Mingyu looked bewildered. “I made you kimchi fried rice.”

Jeonghan blinked at him, then the container. “What?”

“Remember? Yesterday? The phone call?” Mingyu laughed. “Please don’t tell me you were that drunk.”

“What are you talking about?” Jeonghan demanded. “What are you doing here?”

Mingyu squeezed past him- more like muscled himself in through the doorway, heading to the kitchen. “Last night you were blackout drunk and dialed me.”

“No I didn’t,” Jeonghan said warily.

Mingyu smirked. “You said some interesting things.”

“What?” Jeonghan blanched.

“If I hear you saying ‘what’ one more time I’m throwing myself out of the window,” Mingyu informed him, unpacking the food he’d brought and pushing it into the microwave. “Aren’t you curious what you said?”

“No,” Jeonghan refused.

“Mhm,” Mingyu said in that telltale way that meant that he was planning to ramble on anyway. “Well, you called me complaining about your head hurting, apparently something to do with my lamp that had you hitting your head on the bedside table. After ranting to me about that, you complained about eating your pasta cold, and then it was pretty incoherent from there. Wonwoo says thanks for the compliment, by the way.”

Jeonghan shook his head slightly to clear it. This was too much. Kim Mingyu standing in his kitchen after one year, looking for all the world as if they were still together, leaning against the counter next to the stove as he always did. He was even waving one of Jeonghan’s serving spoons around as he talked.

“Who on earth is _Wonwoo?”_

Mingyu gave him a ‘duh’ face. “My boyfriend. The one you said sounded ‘nice’.”

“Haha,” Jeonghan said dryly, then realized that Mingyu was staring at him. “Oh, you’re serious?”

“I mean, considering I was the sober one last night…”

“No, I mean, he’s your boyfriend?” Jeonghan nearly cringed at how enthusiastic he sounded to hear the answer.

Mingyu winced. “Well, it’s complicated. He’s a new intern at the company and he’s rooming at my apartment, a few weeks ago we both got drunk and weird stuff happened and…” Mingyu shrugged. “I don’t know.” He blinked slowly at Jeonghan. “Sorry. I’m oversharing.”

The microwave dinged and Mingyu brought the food out, sticking the spoon in and leading Jeonghan to the table, putting it down in front of him. “There you go. As compensation for my lamp being the source of your struggles. Mingyu, out. Take an aspirin for your head, and please do your dirty dishes.”

Jeonghan opened his mouth to reply, but Mingyu was already gone.

What the hell?

•

“You have been dazed all day,” Soonyoung prodded Jeonghan when they retired to the break room in between shoots. “Are you okay?”

Jeonghan accepted an iced americano from Seungkwan, who was bustling around and handing the cups to the tired talents. He wiped condensation off of the plastic, putting his lips to the straw and sucking the refreshing coffee down his throat. “Yeah, fine.”

The dressing room was as crowded and hot as the hotel ballroom last night, and Jeonghan was glad that today they were dressed in comfortable cotton clothing for the Aeropostal magazine shoot. Much better than any ridiculous thing that Joshua had put him yesterday.

“You were going to tell us something yesterday,” Chan singsonged, sipping on his own americano. “About you and-” Chan and Soonyoung shared a dramatic glance. “Mingyu-ssi.”

“Oh, that,” Jeonghan said, distracted momentarily by Joshua flitting into the room, palette in hand. “I think I’ve got to go and get retouched-”

“You can get retouched here,” Soonyoung pleaded, wrapping his arms around Jeonghan’s waist and keeping him anchored in place. “You’ve got nothing to be retouched for anyway! We’re done here.”

“Tell us,” Chan persisted. “You promised! It’s the perfect time, your supposed ‘rival’ isn’t even scheduled today so there’s no chance of him hearing. Come on! Tell us!”

Joshua arrived next to Jeonghan, raising an eyebrow to Soonyoung’s koala behavior. “What’s this?”

Jeonghan rolled his eyes. “They’re desperate.”

“For?” Joshua gently prodded Soonyoung out of the way, opening a concealer bottle. 

“Details about me and Mingyu’s breakup.”

Joshua nearly dropped the bottle. “Woah.” He glanced at the two wide eyed younger boys. “That’s…”

“I promised I’d tell them,” Jeonghan said wearily. “Regretting it now, but I did promise. When I was drunk as fuck last night.”

“And we’re not getting any younger,” Chan said impatiently, stretching his legs out into a V as he slumped in his chair. “Spill before my hair starts going white.”

“Spill!” Soonyoung pestered, seconds later doing just that as half his americano slopped onto the floor. Jeonghan screeched and flinched away, luckily Joshua’s dark jeans receiving most of the mess.

“Oops,” Soonyoung whispered, his eyes as wide as dinner plates. 

Joshua merely sighed down at his previously white, now coffee-stained vans. “You’re compensating me for that, Kwon.”

“Yeah.”

Chan snickered, grabbing a few tissues and spreading them around on the floor, stretching out his legs again and taking advantage of the soles of his beat up sneakers to swipe around at the mess. “What?” he said when he received a look from Jeonghan. “I can wear whatever I want off-site.”

“You make more than half of people your age, and you can’t buy a new pair of shoes?” Soonyoung grinned. 

“Be mindful that you’re buying me new shoes very soon,” Joshua said crisply, turning back to Jeonghan and beginning to work his magic. “Anyways, Hannie, the kids wanted a story.”

Jeonghan groaned. “Not you too?”

Joshua smirked. “It’s funny to see you get worked up about him, is all.”

“Yeah. _Sure_.” Jeonghan scoffed, clearing his throat. “It all started three years ago.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i never double post in a day but i wanted to just check the story formatting,, so here’s another chapter lmao 
> 
> i’m done for today tho bye


	3. Chapter 3

_ “I’m Kim Mingyu.” _

_ “Yoon Jeonghan. I’m 22, you?” _

__ _ “Twenty. Guess that makes you hyung to me.” _

_ “I guess it does.” _

_ And Jeonghan had shook hands with Mingyu and they’d gone their own paths for a few years- more precisely, two. Two years filled with both of them busy with various projects, always polite when they met each other, always friendly. _

_ And then, the year that Jeonghan turned 24, Pledis had undergone a financial scandal and the company had nearly plummeted into bankruptcy. The previous CEO was jailed and his son, Choi Seungcheol- the future object of Hong Jisoo’s secret affection- was left to pick up the pieces and stitch everything back together. _

_ Seungcheol had fired nearly everyone except the very first talents of Pledis- Jeonghan himself, Kim Seokjin, Jeon Jeongguk, Park Jimin, Kim Taehyung, and Kim Mingyu. He’d hired new staff to manage their finances, Kim Namjoon. And new camera directors and visual design analysts- Lee Jihoon, Min Yoongi, and Jung Hoseok respectively. People had filtered in after that, Seokmin and Hansol the first talent additions after the company’s plunge.  _

_ But that year, the year of Jeonghan’s 24th, was pivotal in his life. Yes, he was drowning in taxes and bills, but there was a light in his life. A new light. _

_ It came in the form of Mingyu asking him if he’d consider the two of them rooming together, because if they were being honest neither of them had money to support themselves on their own. _

_ So Mingyu moved into Jeonghan’s apartment, and suddenly not just the bills seemed to disappear- the dirty laundry and dishes were gone, the air always smelled like vanilla cologne, there were always warm oversized clothes whenever Jeonghan wanted them and the most delicious food he’d ever had waiting for him at the table every night. And yes, the lights were always on and the windows open if the weather was anywhere near acceptable, but those were things Jeonghan could live with because he’d scored the most perfect roommate in history. _

_ Except Mingyu was too perfect, so Jeonghan fell for him, and after a long time Mingyu fell for him too, and things were just going too perfect. _

_ So perfect that Joshua had warned Jeonghan not to take things too far too fast, warned him that relationships moving this quickly were never a good sign.  _

_ But it wasn’t Jeonghan’s fault. The heart wants what it wants.  _

_ And when Mingyu wanted to take Jeonghan to meet his parents who were visiting from Anyang for Mingyu’s 23rd, Jeonghan accepted immediately. _

_ The dinner went fine; more than fine. Mingyu’s parents were sweet and full of laughter, Jeonghan and Mrs. Kim teased Mingyu about making slightly less than Jeonghan despite them working the same profession, Mr. Kim bonded with Jeonghan over their love for Cabernet, and everything was sunshine and roses. _

_ Until the end, when Mrs. Kim hugged Jeonghan goodbye and said happily,  _

_ “We couldn’t ask for a better roommate for Mingyu! We’re so glad he’s found an amazing friend like you.” _

•

_ “You didn’t tell your fucking parents about us?” _

_ “I told you, they’re from a small town and they wouldn’t understand!” Mingyu yelled back. _

_ “That doesn’t matter! It’s a fucking dick move, you know that? For you to pretend the whole time as if you hadn’t mentioned it to them that we were together- if she hadn’t said that at the end I wouldn't have known! When were you even going to tell them?” Jeonghan demanded, knowing that they were screaming at each other so loudly that every neighbor on their apartment floor would definitely have filed a complaint by the next morning. _ __

__ _ “I didn’t want to spring it on them at the first dinner!” Mingyu shouted.  _

_ “Well, so great to know that my boyfriend’s parents are a couple of homophobes!” Jeonghan raked a hand through his hair in frustration, turning away as he panted for air, feeling his asthma flaring up again. It didn’t help that he’d been crying so hard. _

_ “I said it’s not like that,” Mingyu said, frustrated. “I just don’t think they’d understand.” _

_ Jeonghan shook his head, still trying to regain his breath.  _

_ Mingyu hurried to him, already holding his inhaler. “Hyung-” _

_ Jeonghan snatched it from him, shoving the tube in his mouth and breathing through it, knowing his eyes were rimmed red as he looked away from Mingyu, tearing up again. _

_ “Hyung,” Mingyu repeated, this time his tone pleading. “I promise I’ll tell them, I’ll sit them down and talk about it-” _

_ “Are you ashamed to be with me?” Jeonghan whispered tremulously, pulling the inhaler from his lips.  _

_ The living room was dead silent.  _

_ “Are you?” Jeonghan whispered, feeling burning hot tears slipping down his cheeks. “Are you ashamed to be with a guy?” _

_ “No,” Mingyu answered softly. “I would never be.” _

_ “If you weren’t ashamed, you’d have told them.” _

_ Mingyu sighed. “It’s not easy. They’re not like your parents. They’re close minded as hell.” _

_ “You didn’t try at all.” Jeonghan muttered. “That shows how much you care.” _

_ “I’m a coward. You know that. I’ve never been as bold as you.”  _

_ Their voices had quietened now, Mingyu having leashed in his temper upon seeing Jeonghan so disheveled. Jeonghan hated these kinds of quiet conversations; somehow they seemed darker and more miserable than shouting matches.  _

_ “You should've tried,” Jeonghan said simply. “You didn’t try.” _ _  
_ __ _ “Hyung,” Mingyu said, but he’d already shattered the amount of trust that Jeonghan had put faithfully in him. _

_ “Pack your things,” was all that Jeonghan said. “If you couldn’t tell them now, you never will. And I don’t want that kind of double life.” _

_ And so Jeonghan broke up with Kim Mingyu on the latter’s 23rd birthday, and it’d been nearly a year and a half since then.  _

•

“Damn.” 

Jeonghan sipped on his coffee, enjoying the shocked reactions from Soonyoung and Chan.

“And that’s how it went,” Joshua finished. 

Chan blinked slowly. “Wow. That’s like… out of a drama.”

Jeonghan cast the younger boy a cold look. “Excuse me, that’s my life.”

“Oh, I mean, not like that. But it sounds like something a majestic scriptwriter would pull. What a twist!”

“Dude, shut up, what’s wrong with you,” Soonyoung muttered, nudging Chan. 

“It’s alright, really,” Jeonghan said. “I don’t care anymore- ow, shit!”

“What?” Joshua asked, utterly confused as he brushed hair off Jeonghan’s forehead, his hand brushing against the swollen lump from last night.

“I hit my head yesterday,” Jeonghan said darkly, drawing away from Joshua and adjusting his hair himself.

“How do you get yourself into these things, hyung?” Soonyoung asked amusedly.

“It was not me,” Jeonghan glared. “It was Mingyu’s stupid lamp.”

“Oho,” Joshua said. “We still have that?”

“I couldn’t bring myself to throw it away.” Jeonghan furiously sipped on his coffee, ignoring the very dramaticized glances the three other men were throwing at each other. 

“Right.” Soonyoung picked up the sopping-with-coffee paper towels, making a face. “I’m going to throw this away. Like you should do with that lamp. Keeping your ex’s things isn’t good for you.”

“Thanks for the advice, but I’ve already tried,” Jeonghan said as he adjusted his outfit, checking himself out in the mirror. “I think I look fine. Come on, Shua, let’s go.”

“Yeah, why aren’t you out of your costume yet?” Chan asked curiously. “The shoot’s over and all. And you’re getting your makeup redone too.”

“Joshua’s taking me to the nature reserve to get some new headshots done,” Jeonghan explained. “It’s been nearly a year since my last ones, and I’ve changed my hairstyle and all since then, so.”

Chan nodded, standing up and gathering his things. “Who’s the photographer?”

“None but  _ moi _ ,” Joshua said, grinning at Chan’s dubious expression. “What? Just because I’m good at putting makeup on people doesn’t mean that I can’t wield a camera. You’ll see. Once the pictures come out, you’ll come running to me to do your photobook too.”

“And Shua’s free,” Jeonghan bragged. “You don’t have to pay a few hundred for the good shots.”

Joshua pinched him lightly. “I’m free for you because you’re my best friend. Thank you.”

“Can you do mine for free if I say that you’re my favorite hyung?” Chan asked hopefully.

Joshua snickered. “Hell no.”

“Ah well,” Chan sighed, swinging his bag over his shoulder. “No harm in asking. Well, good luck at the shoot. I hope the pictures come out nicely.”

“Thanks,” Jeonghan smiled back at the younger, and then Joshua swept him out to his car.

•

The nature reserve was slightly humid yet still pleasant, the crisp fall air making for a beautiful view of leaves in shades of burning crimson and pale yellow. The flora that’d left their trees had carpeted the soft dirt upon which Joshua and Jeonghan strolled, the former holding his camera and the latter empty handed, arms crossed over his outerwear cardigan to fend off the slight chill as he leaned into his best friend.

“Han, you’re doing it again,” Joshua said gently, nudging Jeonghan away. “Walking into my path.”

Jeonghan laughed softly, correcting himself to walk in a straight line and not into the side of whoever was next to him. “Sorry.”

“You’ll never get over it,” Joshua chuckled, casting his eyes down the winding lane fluttering with colors of autumn. “Let’s find somewhere with a neutral background, I think that some trees that’ve changed their color should be good, you look really nice with orange and red tones in the back…”

“Oh,” Jeonghan said as he remembered something, Joshua gently taking him by the elbow and leading him down a smaller trail. “Mingyu brought me food this morning.”

Joshua gave him a sharp look. “Why?”

“Apparently I drunk dialed him last night.” Jeonghan winced at the exasperated look on Joshua’s face. “Okay, I know… you always tell me not to use my phone when I’m out of it, but I just…”

“Do you remember anything I said?”

“Well, I didn’t, but he filled me in this morning… apparently I told him I missed his cooking and I said a lot of weird stuff.”

“Great,” Joshua said sarcastically. 

“There was a guy at his place,” Jeonghan added nonchalantly, kicking at a pebble.

“Really?” Joshua’s tone of mild interest really indicated a stronger longing for knowledge, as Jeonghan knew.

“Yeah. His name’s Won-something… Mingyu made it sound like a friends-with-benefits kind of thing, but I don’t really know.”

Joshua nodded slowly. “Wait- by any chance is it Wonwoo? Jeon Wonwoo. He’s a finance intern.”

“I think Mingyu said something like that. He’s new at the company.”

“I’ll ask Namjoon-ssi what Wonwoo’s like,” Joshua suggested, naming the finances department director.

“No, no,” Jeonghan said vehemently. “We’re not asking anyone about anyone. What if Mingyu finds out? Won’t he think it’s weird that we’re asking people around the company about his boyfriend? And don’t even play the ‘they won’t question it if I ask’ card, Shua, everyone here knows that we’re best friends and calling each other formally in meetings doesn’t really convince anyone. Not to mention that I don’t care what Wonwoo’s like. Why should I care? It’s not my business, and frankly I have no interest in whoever Mingyu’s spending his nights with.”

“But  _ I’m _ curious now!”

“Well, restrain your curiosity,” Jeonghan tsked. “I hope Mingyu’s at least told Wonwoo that he’s a lying piece of shit that won’t even tell his homophobic parents about his boyfriend.”

Joshua snickered. “From the doe-eyed look of that kid, I don’t think Wonwoo’s in the know about that. I’ve seen him around a few times, he’s actually a year older than Mingyu if my math’s right but he looks about five years younger what with those sweet eyes and tiny body. He’s innocent as hell.”

“Should I tell him?” Jeonghan pondered.

“Yeah, that’s really so much better than my idea, Han. ‘Hey, intern of a department I don’t work in and have never talked to, the guy you’re screwing is my ex and he’s fucked up, don’t bother’ I wonder how that’ll go down?”

“You are so mean to me,” Jeonghan sighed over Joshua’s cackling. “As if I don’t have any dirt on you.”

“Pray tell, I’m absolutely dying to know what dirt you’ve got on me,” Joshua said semi-seriously, attempting to school his features into calm but cracking up nevertheless.

“Hmm,” Jeonghan said, drawing it out for dramatics. “How about the mysterious thing going on between you and Seungcheol?”

Joshua’s face was practically on fire at the name of their CEO. “Han, no!”

“I literally have the audio tapings, Shua, you can’t even deny it-”

“That’s actually illegal, you know, you can’t record without consent-”

“Suck it up, buttercup.”

Joshua shook his head in irritation. “Dear god. Go stand over there, those bushes look nice. You can sit if you want, just get comfortable.”

Jeonghan skipped over, still grinning as he settled himself in the pile. “Like this?”

“Yeah, tell me when you want me to start,” Joshua directed, kneeling a few feet away and adjusting his camera and reflecting circle. 

“Cool.” Jeonghan shook himself slightly, slipping into focused mode and starting to pose. “Go.”

The next hour passed in a series of different angles and lighting changes, Joshua dragging Jeonghan all over the park to whatever areas the designer deemed best suited to Jeonghan’s face and style.

Jeonghan was lounging on a bench now, his hair spilled over the wood, cheek pressed to the bench seat after Joshua had wiped the whole thing down for him. 

“Too close,” Jeonghan mumbled as Joshua’s lens came further into his space.

“Shut up, it’s a tight shot. Your skin looks great today, don’t worry.”

“My face hurts from being still for so long.”

“I’m almost done. Look off in the distance.”

Jeonghan allowed the sound of Joshua’s camera shutter to fade in the background of his mind as he let his gaze wander the park.

Families with small children were meandering the hedges and open grounds, couples strolling amongst the bushes and under pretty canopies.

Jeonghan heard a familiar laugh, so faint that he must’ve imagined it, and suddenly shot up, earning a very angry noise from Joshua as the latter lifted his face from the camera screen. 

“What the hell, Han? I was just getting it into focus-”

Jeonghan squinted as he scanned the park again, soon catching sight of a lean, handsome man with round framed glasses leaning against a tree, smiling shyly as his admirer kneeled on the ground much as Joshua had, positioning the camera before taking another picture, laughing again at the outcome. 

Joshua followed Jeonghan’s line of sight to the familiar broad-shouldered individual now nearly laying on the ground in an attempt to capture the best angle possible.

“Is that-” Joshua murmured to Jeonghan, but Jeonghan was already gone. 

Jeonghan casually walked in the direction of the couple, hiding behind a nearby tree- as bad as that sounded- in order to hear their conversation. 

“Gyu, that’s enough,” the man leaning against the tree giggled. “You’ve taken a thousand by now.”

“I’m proving my point,” Mingyu replied teasingly, sticking his tongue out at Wonwoo. “Being a model is just as hard as being a finance intern. You’re the one who told me posing was easy compared to making spreadsheets.”

“Alright, I cede the point,” Wonwoo said exasperatedly, but he was still smiling as he pushed off the tree and made his way over to Mingyu, gently pulling the younger up to his feet and steadying him when Mingyu stumbled. “But seriously, you should come to our side of the building sometime. Spreadsheets aren’t are easy as you think.”

“Obviously they’re not, why do you think I picked modeling over business school?”

Wonwoo chuckled. “You’re really something. Should we grab dinner someplace tonight?”

“Outside?” Mingyu frowned, interlacing his fingers with Wonwoo’s. “That trash? Why bother when I could cook for you instead?”

Jeonghan felt his heart physically contract with some sort of strong feeling, one so rich and nostalgic that he nearly lost his balance for a second. Grabbing the trunk of the tree, he peeked around it again. 

“So… tonight.” Wonwoo was saying, now holding both of Mingyu’s hands as he gazed up into the latter’s face.

“Tonight,” Mingyu repeated, smiling coyly as he captured Wonwoo’s lips with his.

“What are you doing here?” Joshua hissed from behind Jeonghan, causing him to startle and nearly fall over again as he whipped around to find Joshua’s face inches from his. Joshua didn’t seem to realize their proximity as he added, “do you know how creepy this would look if Mingyu saw?”

“Be quiet,” Jeonghan breathed, trying his best to see without turning his head. 

“I was thinking we could talk,” Wonwoo murmured. “About us.”

“Us?” Mingyu questioned.

“You know… everything’s just really unclear right now. I just want to understand what we are.”

“You’re mine, Jeon, that’s all there is to it.”

“Han,” Joshua whispered. “Han, we should go. This isn't good for you.”

“Don’t you dare talk to me informally until we’ve made anything official,” Wonwoo said, his voice light and joking, and he must’ve done something then, because Mingyu’s soft laugh rang through the clearing. 

“Alright, hyung, we can talk tonight then. Over your favorite dinner.”

“You’re gonna bribe me this way?” 

“Oh, definitely.”

“Whatever, then. Can we go? It’s getting cold.”

“I always tell you to put a jacket on, hyung,” Mingyu whined, and Joshua and Jeonghan stared at each other in wide eyed panic as they heard footsteps crunching through the dried leaves, coming closer and closer.

“Well, you were in such a rush to prove your point that I didn’t have time to grab a coat,” Wonwoo’s voice came from the other side of the tree.

“What do we-” Joshua began in a hurried whisper-

It wasn't like he had a choice. There weren’t any options left.

Jeonghan steeled his nerves and smashed his lips onto Joshua’s. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i’m alive!! 
> 
> was really busy lately, this year is going to be crazy for me academically so pls bear with me as i try to fit updates in. writing is fun but hard 
> 
> i’m not too satisfied with this chapter so i may come back and edit but who knows 
> 
> please leave a comment to bolster my pathetic self esteem thx
> 
> tell someone u love them today! i love all of u  
> -mingyuwu


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